I’ve lost faith in men plenty of times (I’ve had it restored a few times, too). But somehow, despite some the mean things I’ve read about women doing to each other, and despite the fact that I’ve always said I would rather have a son than a daughter (boys can be exhausting, but little girls are conniving), I never actually lost faith in women. After all, I’m one, and even though I’m nowhere near perfect, I happen to think there’s a lot of good in me that could be pretty wonderful under the right circumstances.
That all changed yesterday when I read this article. We’re not going to focus on the writing style for now, which is, at best, absurdly distracting, because otherwise I’ll never get to my actual point. We’re just going to focus on the content.
The content is that 1.) everyone cheats, and 2.) everyone cheats. Oh, and also, 3.) cheating is fun.
I’ve read diatribes like this one from men before. I’ve obligingly rolled my eyes and thought, Well, it’s a guy–what are you going to do? I’ve even read plenty of articles and remarks from women who don’t believe in monogamy or don’t want a settled, traditional relationship. So what? It’s their lives; they can do whatever they want with them. To each his own. Maybe I should have that same reaction to this article. But I don’t.
This one makes me cringe and never want to attempt to have a meaningful romantic relationship ever again–not because I don’t trust men, and not because I’m worried about what women like the author might try to get my boyfriend/husband to do, but simply because reading that article makes me embarrassed to be a woman. To read that a woman believes everyone acts a certain way simply because she does and if they don’t then they’re fooling themselves makes my cheeks figuratively flush. Isn’t that the kind of closed-mindedness that we, as women, and we, as human beings, are constantly struggling against?
Clearly, the article was written to provoke reactions such as mine, and I’d be better off just ignoring it, but instead I’m taking the bait like a starving trout. So yeah, I’m a little ashamed of myself for giving the author exactly what she wanted. But I’m more ashamed of her. Much, much more. Ashamed that I belong to the same gender.
Or you know what? Maybe I just can’t get past the writing.