Every relationship article ever that says it’s impossible to change someone so don’t even try: I’m calling your bluff.
Growing up, there were several fruit flavors I avoided: peach, white grape, mango, and orange. Though I enjoyed the fruits themselves, food items or juices made out of those fruits were gross to me (except for orange juice; for some reason, he made the cut).
It wasn’t something I ever tried to change. Unlike with my aversion to tomatoes, I could pretty easily get by in life without addressing this taste issue.
Then, 2 years ago, I was visiting my sister and brother-in-law in Florida to see my brand new nephew, and they had a cook-out. And there was peach cobbler. I never ate peach cobbler because it was made with peaches and made me sad it wasn’t apple cobbler. But that day, I ate it, and it was good. Huh?
Next, a couple of months ago, I realized the best flavor of Luigi’s Italian Ice is mango. What is going on?
Finally, yesterday, I ate a goji white grape Edy’s fruit bar. Now, maybe the “goji” is the part that made it delicious. I don’t know. But what I do know is I never would have even tried it if I hadn’t already discovered not everything made with mango and peach is disgusting.
That’s a pretty big change. And sure, you could argue that it was just my tastes changing as I got older, and that’s not the same as someone changing the way they mean in relationship articles. But I’ve also witnessed people changing; in fact, because it has happened before, my main fear in any relationship is that the person will change and no longer want to be with me.
People change. They can, they do, and they will continue changing, regardless of how many relationship articles are written. Suggesting women shouldn’t try to change men because it’s a dumb idea and probably won’t work out in their favor in the end is fine with me. But saying you can’t change someone? It’s just not true. And if I have to eat 14 thousand more goji white grape popsicles to provide sufficient evidence, then I will–I’m just that committed to the cause.