#249: Eat a bucket of tater tots

06 Sep

So, okay, I realize this probably doesn’t sound like a huge feat.  I love to eat, I make no secret of the fact, and I would eat all day long if I didn’t have to function like a somewhat normal human being in order to pay my bills.

But you don’t understand how many tater tots were in this bucket.  A ton.  And the bucket also contained pigs in a blanket.  Normally, I would not eat the whole contents all by myself (technically it was an appetizer, meant to be shared between at least 3 people, but everyone else was waiting for their boyfriends to arrive so they could share something with them, so I was on my own).  I did the best I could, but I left about 6 or 7 tater tots in the bottom.  I don’t need to be quite so gross as to finish the whole thing, I thought.

Then the waitress tried to take the bucket away.

There are several things I cannot stand at a bar or restaurant: enforcing silly rules for no reason, tricking people into spending more, and overcharging.

First, the happy hour 2 for 1 drink special rule of, “You must have 2 of the exact same drink, no matter what,” was almost humorously clung to–a friend wanted to switch up the type of soda she had with her vodka: nope. “Sorry.  Can’t do it.  Even though it costs the same and is ridiculous, it’s the rule.”  Okay, that’s dumb, but they’re allowed to make up their own rules.

Then, we ordered a bucket of beer.  The menu stated it would contain 6 bottles.  Upon ordering, a friend asked whether he could get 2 beers each of 3 different kinds, and the waitress said they had to all be the same (again, that weird obsession with consistency).  When the bucket arrived with only 5 beers and we pointed out the error, the waitress said, “No, it only comes with 5.  That’s a typo on the menu.”  Actually, that’s a typo in your brain since we’d already talked about how we were expecting 6 and you went along with it without mentioning the issue.

Next, a friend closed out her tab early and noticed she was overcharged but didn’t want to wait 20 minutes for the waitress to make it back through the crowd of 21 year olds (which was our own fault for not realizing a bar near NYU would be packed with children on the night of the first NFL game).

It was all pretty obnoxious.  But the thing that bothers me even more is when servers take away my food before I’m finished.  So, by the time 3 separate people tried to remove the bucket of tater tots in front of me, I was intent upon keeping that bucket. “No, I am not done,” I said over and over again (even though I was). “Yes, I’m still working on these tater tots,” I assured the waitress (even though I wasn’t).

Of course, eventually, I ended up eating the rest of the tater tots because I had a point to prove.  What was that point?  Something about how you do NOT take my plate when there’s still food on it because I am stubborn enough to turn it into a battle, and frankly it’s just not worth it for you to try to fight that one.  When it comes to food, I’m going to win.

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Posted by on September 6, 2012 in Food/Drink


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