Did you ever Christmas! find yourself with a desire to Christmas! go to a restaurant that is so packed in that you Christmas! can hardly get in the door? Did you also want Christmas! to have to shove your way into the building just Christmas! to have a chance to crowd in like Christmas! sardines for a fighting shot at reaching Christmas! the bartender? Read the rest of this entry »
Monthly Archives: December 2014
Are you even paying attention to what you’re reading now or are you too preoccupied with exclaiming, “How could you have taken so long to listen to ‘Serial’?”
Okay, I believe you. But I’m still a little suspicious.
Which is apt, I suppose, for a post about this podcast.
Know how I can tell Cleveland is becoming “cooler”? When a restaurant seats 35-40 people, serves only breakfast, and proclaims on their website that they cannot accommodate groups of more than 6 people on the weekends.
Know how I can tell Cleveland will never be New York? When, despite the crowd, 2 separate workers come up to our large party to assure us a table will be ready soon, instead of acting like we’re somehow intruding by trying to eat at their busy restaurant.
Every time the 41-year-old woman from Ohio sobbed and whined because she was afraid the 26-year-old guy from Tunisia would leave her or was maybe only living with her in America to get his green card (a possibility all of her friends and family saw as a given), I felt a little bad for laughing.
But reality shows tend to either make you jealous of other people’s lives or feel better about your own life, and 90 Day Fiancé definitely does the latter. Read the rest of this entry »
When these parties first started becoming popular, I felt bad for the ugly Christmas sweaters. But now that they’ve become so ubiquitous entire companies have been created to supply people with their tree- and present- and Santa-covered clothes, I’m glad there’s a purpose for all of those unfortunate shirts.
I’ve always been shy. People who know me now don’t believe that when they see me introduce myself to strangers at a party. “I don’t even do that,” they say, trying to convince me I’m not shy. But they don’t know I’ve worked very hard to pretend not to be. Read the rest of this entry »
“Hi, how are you? If you get super glue on your skin, does it ever come off?”
The frantic call to my brother is just one way you can tell I’m sometimes impetuous. Only after I carelessly touched the thing I was super-gluing with my finger did I bother to read the back of the bottle to see whether getting it on your skin is permanently damaging.
It didn’t confirm–only, “DO NOT GET IT ON YOUR SKIN.”