I do not blame myself. No, I don’t blame myself for missing any reviews online that may have mentioned the fact that Oliver’s employees a band that blasts–yes, blasts–soul music during brunch so loudly it’s impossible to have a conversation with your fellow diners sitting across from you at the table.
I do blame you. You–anyone who has ever declared, “I love music!” on a dating website or during an icebreaker at work. You–anyone who thinks live bands in restaurants are so romantic.
You, who have all made it so our collective conscious can’t fathom the possibility that a human being might not want to be serenaded throughout their meal, that there might be a reason to come to a particular restaurant that has nothing to do with blaring vocals.
I may have enjoyed this restaurant had I not been kept from covering my ears only by a sense of decency. (Okay, I did have to cover them a few times. I don’t have that much decency.) True, one of my dining companions received cold eggs and bacon. I’d still take a risk on my food being heated to the proper temperature next time. I won’t take a risk on having the obnoxious crooning accompany my meal.
But don’t worry; I’m not blaming myself.